How to let go of the past and someone you love when your head understands but your heart still holds on. Practical steps and the energy view.
“How do I let go of the past?” People usually ask this when they have been trying for a long time without success. The relationship ended a year or five years ago, yet the thoughts keep coming back. A divorce, a betrayal, a broken promise, a person who left but still lives inside you. Your head knows you need to move on, but something is holding you. If you are searching for how to let go of the past, how to let go of someone, or how to let go of someone you love who is no longer by your side, this article is for you. I will share what helps in practice, how I see it as a bioenergy healer, and when it is worth looking for other help.
What letting go really means
Letting go does not mean forgetting. Nor does it mean pretending it did not hurt, or excusing what was wrong. Letting go means the past stays in the past and no longer rules your present. The memory remains, but it no longer hurts every time you touch it. You can hear that person’s name or bump into them in the street and calmly walk on. It is not only a former partner that we let go of. People come to let go of parents who have died, grown children who have moved far away, friends they have lost touch with, even an old version of themselves from before an illness or a divorce. The principle is the same everywhere. Until then, your energy keeps flowing backwards: into an old conversation, into “what if”, into anger or longing. That is why people so often feel tired even when they are not doing anything special.
Why it is so hard to let go of someone you love
Usually a few things hold us. The first is unfinished business: there was no last conversation, and questions were left without answers. The mind likes finished stories and keeps returning to the unfinished one. The second is guilt or anger. Anger binds no less than love does: as long as you are angry, that person still takes up space in your life. The third is identity. You walked part of your life together, with shared plans and habits, and letting them go feels like letting go of part of yourself. Another is habit. Thoughts about that person become a path the mind follows automatically whenever you are tired or sad. And finally there is hope that things might still change, which will not let you close the door.
How to let go of the past: practical steps
Start with boundaries. If you can, stop following that person on social media for a while, and do not look through old photos and messages every evening. This is not revenge; it is looking after yourself. Write a letter you will never send: everything that hurts, what you are grateful for, what you cannot forgive just yet. Afterwards you can burn it or tear it up and feel that something is coming to an end. Talk it through with a close friend or a psychologist, because things left unsaid go round in your head far longer. Put the objects that remind you every day into a box and store it where you cannot see it. And little by little, build things that are only yours: a new morning ritual, a hobby, a trip. It is easier to let go when you have somewhere to go.
Another simple but powerful thing is forgiveness. Forgiving does not mean saying everything was fine. It means no longer carrying the other person’s guilt inside you. You can start small: each day write one sentence, “I forgive you for...” and “I forgive myself for...”. Yes, yourself too. Very often what holds us most tightly is not what the other person did, but what we cannot forgive ourselves for: that we put up with it too long, that we did not notice, that we said the wrong thing. And do not expect to let go within a week. There will be good days and there will be setbacks, when it seems everything has come back. That is normal. It is not failure but part of the road.
The energy perspective: bonds that remain
Having worked with people since 2010, I see that energy bonds form between us and the people close to us. While the relationship is alive, this is natural. But when a person leaves, the bond sometimes remains and keeps drawing energy. People describe it in very similar words: as if someone were holding their hand, though there is no one there. Sometimes heavy emotions that are not your own also come through that bond, such as a former partner’s anger or longing. And sometimes the knot is older than the relationship itself: the same pattern repeats with different people, and then it is worth looking at karma or family experiences. When such a bond is untied, it harms neither you nor the other person. On the contrary, both become freer. It is not a curse and nothing frightening. It is simply a knot that can be untied.
When a doctor or a psychologist is needed
If the past has kept you from living normally for a long time, if you constantly feel sadness, emptiness or sleeplessness, if you no longer enjoy what used to bring you joy, please talk to a doctor or a psychologist. This is especially important if there was violence or another trauma in the past. Bioenergy healing can complement their help, but it does not replace it. If you have thoughts of harming yourself, call 112 straight away or a crisis line (in Lithuania, Vilties linija 116 123, open 24 hours). Abroad, call your local emergency number.
How I can help
During karma diagnostics and bioenergy correction I use a dowsing rod to find what is holding you: a bond with a particular person, old guilt or anger, an unfinished lesson or a family pattern. Once I find the knot, I calmly untie it, and I help you release a bond that is no longer needed with gratitude, without anger. If the person you want to let go of has died, I also look at whether their soul has left in peace. Many people tell me that afterwards their thoughts about the past simply quietened, and they found strength for new things. I work at my studio in Kaišiadorys, halfway between Kaunas and Vilnius, or remotely from a photo, wherever you are. A session lasts from one hour to an hour and a half. Sometimes old memories or tears come up for a few days afterwards. That is normal; it is how what was held inside for a long time comes to an end.
If you feel the past is still holding on to you, give me a call. The first phone conversation is free. You tell me what is going on, and together we decide where it makes sense to start. Letting go is possible, and there is no need to rush it.
Karma is the sum of past actions, and its consequences affect us today. I find out which lessons you brought with you and what keeps repeating, so you can let it go and move on.
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